The early hello

 The obstetrician who admitted me came to see me before I left the ward. I cannot remember clearly if this was on the day of my C-section or the previous day. I do remember how caring and honest she was. She warned me that we were in an unknown situation and that she was concerned about how baby would enter the world. She wanted to prepare me for the worst, as that was a likely outcome. By this time I was completely disassociated I think, like an out of body experience watching this happening to someone else, it couldn't be happening to me. 

The morning of my C-section we were taken to a private room to prepare me for my operation. Our parents were also there with us. We sat and chatted, trying to be as normal as possible in this completely abnormal situation. The midwife came to put a cannula in my hand and, as usual, finding a suitable vein was a nightmare. I have very thin veins and often find myself full of holes when anyone wants blood out of me! The midwife was great though, they didn't attempt it until they were sure they had found a suitable vein, which they did in the side of my wrist. I have to say not the most comfy position, but needs must. The midwife then hooked me up to a drip containing (now I am foggy here but I think it was - please correct me if I am wrong) magnesium sulphate. She explained that I might have a strange sensation of suddenly feeling very hot, like a hot flush, that starts in my head then flows through my body. Well the heat certainly came within seconds of the drip starting, but I have to say, typically for me, it didn't radiate from my head... of course it started from my bum! I sat there and suddenly it was like I was sat on a radiator! I had my hospital gown on, my lovely hospital socks, Aly was ready in his scrubs, and we waited. 

We were first on the list for the day, but there had been an emergency C-section first thing so things were a little delayed. We left our parents behind and walked down to the theatre. It was very overwhelming, there were so many people in there. As I remember it there was my surgical midwife, two surgical obstetricians, there was an anaesthetist, and perhaps a couple more support staff, in addition there were the neonatal nurses and doctors ready to take my baby away for life support. I was instructed to sit on the edge of the bed and cuddle my pillow, leaning forward. This is so that the anaesthetist can scan my spine the find the place to inject the spinal anaesthetic. I sat there for a good few minutes while scanning took place, and I definitely felt there was some difficulty in locating the sweet spot. Turns out I have a wonky spine, another thing to add to the list of weird things happening. They located the spot and I was prepared for the spinal. Aly and some assistants were instructed that as soon as the spinal was injected to get me laid on the table, otherwise id fall flat on my face off the table. We chuckled at that notion, obviously safe in the knowledge that that wouldn't be allowed to happen. 

I remember feeling very shaky at this point. The thought of a big injection going into my spine was, well, sending shivers down it. I felt sick. The anaesthetist advised that they were numbing the area around my spine with local anaesthetic so that I didn't feel the spinal injection. I felt a couple of pricks in my back, either side of my spine, they stung a little. The big injection, well I was amazed, I didn't feel a thing! I knew it was done as everyone quickly flocked round me and laid me on my back. I had to have a catheter fitted (delightful I know) and to test that you are numb they run this spray up the side of your body and ask you to tell them when you feel the cold. It only felt cold when it reached my armpit - the spinal was doing its job. 

At this point in our story I just want to say how wonderful all the consultants, doctors and nurses were. They kept my spirits up by joking and laughing with me, asking us about ourselves, keeping us well informed of everything going on, but in a calm and soothing manner. I so wish I could remember them all more clearly, they looked after us all so wonderfully and gave me the best possible care under the circumstances. They are truly special people. The lead obstetrician was particularly funny, asking me 'did you feel that?' and, when I answered no, said 'thank goodness I just stuck the scalpel in'.

The procedure started and every step of the way they explained what was happening and what I will probably feel. You may not feel pain, but you still feel something when you've had a spinal. It is extremely peculiar, you can feel their hands reaching into you and there is quite a bit of tugging. My baby was quite far in still so they really had to get inside me, and that you can feel. Then, suddenly, baby was here, in the flesh, and she was a baby girl. They explained she was clearly stunned to be out as she technically wasn't ready to be, but they quickly showed her to me before they rushed her away to the neonatal doctors and nurses to check her over and place her in an incubator. Aly made the mistake of standing up to kiss me, and saw over the screen that hides my open tummy. Poor Aly. He was still smiling though and he went with our beautiful baby girl. I was stitched up and taken to recovery. I was so glad Aly was with her, but it was so incredibly painful to have only got a glimpse of her before she was taken away.